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I was vacuuming the 2014 Pilot with the vacuum plugged into one of the 12v outlets and the power coming solely from the battery and I heard a clicking sounds so I looked at the dashboard. The ABS light was flashing (and I guess making the clicking noise), so I went and turned the car off and then tried to turn the car on and it wouldn't even turn over. The ABS light flashed again. Even though the battery light was not even on, I thought it might have been drained by the vacuum, so I tried jumping the car, but that didn't do anything either. I saw someone on this site put the car in drive, then park, and then it started, but I couldn't shift gears at all. Thoughts?
 

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Instant thought is that the battery is run down, kaput, or the battery connections are poor, or some combination. Did you accidentally connect the jumper cables backwards by chance?

Diagnostic steps will start with a voltmeter to test the voltage at the battery, and may also include a battery charger to bring it back some.

The suggestion to cycle the gear lever is targeted at the neutral safety switch, which only allows the starter in neutral or park positions. Meanwhile, there's a safety solenoid that prevents the lever from moving until you push on the brake pedal. All symptoms like this say the battery is dead, with not enough energy left to cycle that solenoid.

How old is the battery, and were there other symptoms prior to your episode? Batteries last five years or so in most service, less in hot climates. Was the engine running while you ran the vacuum?
 
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