Never Say to a Cop

[PrG]

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
>
> 2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
>
> 3.Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
>
> 4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good
>job!
>
>
> 5. Are You Andy or Barney?
>
> 6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a
>police officer.
>
> 7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
>
> 8. I pay your salary!
>
> 9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a
>warning, too!
>
>
> 10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
>
>
> 11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other
>cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
>
> 12. When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have you been
>drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look
>glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

[kemosabe]

I reckon this young fellow broke all twelve of those rules....

[PaulV7]

One time I was driving home from the bar and got pulled over. The cop walked up to my door and asked me to step out of the car. I opened the door and fell out. He was like "you can't even walk." I told him "I know that's why I'm driving."

[kemosabe]

I got pulled over by a cop once. He walked up to my window and I rolled it down. He asked me, "How many drinks have you had, son? I replied, "Just one...... after another, after another, ......"