For men only

[wmasd]

Men strike back! ! ! ! ! ! !

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told.
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman!
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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[ramirami]

good one....

[waynerd]

I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.

Amen, preacher!

[Alexandra242628]

Well now see that is not fair....

Men are like....



1. Men are like ...Laxatives ..... They irritate the crap out of you.
2. Men are like .......Bananas ..... The older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like .....Weather ..... Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like ......Blenders ... You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are like ....Chocolate Bars .... Sweet, smooth, &they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like .....Commercials ..... You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like .......Department Stores .... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like ........Government Bonds .... They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like .......Mascara ..... They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like ....Popcorn ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like Snowstorms ..... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
12. Men are like .......Lava Lamps ... Fun to look at, but not very bright.
13. Men are like .....Parking Spots ....... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.

[Art]

[74PILOTMOM]

"11. Men are like Snowstorms ..... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last."

THAT is hilarious!!!

[JFHughesNJ]

Women are like computers.........No one other than their creator understands their internal logic



also


Men are like computers.........it only takes 1 button to turn them on

[Titans Fan]

HEY! NO FAIR! There are girls here in our "for men only" clubhouse thread.

[74PILOTMOM]

Yeah...you're not safe anywhere! I even infiltrated the thongs thread!!!

[BigDogDad]

Originally posted by 74PILOTMOM
Yeah...you're not safe anywhere! I even infiltrated the thongs thread!!!

Uh... care to share which pic is yours so we can all review your assets?

[DanL]

An oldie, but goodie...need to type this quick before my wife comes in the room..

Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden feeling very alone. Suddenly, he heard a booming voice: "Adam, what troubles you?" "Lord, this is a beautiful place, however, I'm lonely and have no one to share it with." Adam replied. Then the loud voice said "I understand, Adam, and shall make you a companion of your own flesh called 'woman' who shall cook and clean for you and always agree with your every decision. This 'woman' shall bear your children and care for them and shall freely give you love, attention and compassion whenever you desire it."

Adam tentatively responded "That sounds wonderful Lord, but I'm not sure I understand the 'of your own flesh' part. Does that mean you'll be using a part of my body to make this 'woman'?"

The Lord responded "Why of course Adam, creating a 'woman' like that shall require an arm and a leg."

To which Adam quietly asked, "Lord, what can I get for just a rib?"

The rest is history...