My sons hockey tournament rant

[newblu]

I'm not sure why I feel like I have to voice a dissenting opinion here but for some reason i do, although I know it will be unpopular.

If you can't tell from my avatar, I'm an umpire - for youth baseball. So many times I hear how the official's out to get us, they're "homers", they made bad calls, etc. And it's almost always from the parents and coaches. The kids, well they take their lead from the adults. Rather than tell your son that sometimes it's not fair, which actually disrespects the official, why not demonstrate some respect for the ref and tell your son the truth - that you don't know why he (the ref) called (or didn't call) something and that perhaps he saw it differently or had a better view.

Sure officials make bad calls, but they get a whole lot more right. And they're generally in a better position to see the play than dad from the stands.

could they have been calling a one sided game? sure...but who cares? these were 6-8 year olds. IMO that's too young to be competing in competitive tournament anyway. Oh it wasn't a competitive tourney? then lighten up!!

I'd be willing to bet that if no adult had raised the issue of the seemingly incompetent refs, the little 6-8 yo guys would have forgotten about it as soon as they got their post game snack.

I've never read the rules of hockey but the very first rule in baseball, including pros, starts "Baseball is a game...". I suspect the hockey rules aren't a whole lot different. I thought we're supposed to "play" games. So let the kids play - at 6-8 it shouldn't be about winning anyway.

i apologize for the length of this post and I apologize to anyone I might have offended. i thought that the observations from a youth sports official might be in order.

just my 2c. go ahead and fire away

[mgorbsk]

Those Parents on the other team haven't got a clue of the potential effects of their actions. Take me and my Brother who is 1 yr older than I am. We grew up in Philly, playing street hockey, league football. We both played Football, track, baseball which carried through High School.

The difference was, my older Brother was always better. I was OK, but he was starting pitcher, Team Captain middle linebacker, PA State finalist for shot put. Since he had more ability than I did, my Dad was one of those screaming Dads and always pressuring him to do better. So much that I find out like 10 yrs after HS that he did steroids in High School. So that's how come he benched 300 and something pounds and beat the S*%T out of anybody that came across his path.

Fast forward to today at age 36 and 37. I have a great Wife, marriage, and 3y/o Son. We're on track to retire slightly after 50. We went to College together(me and Bro). He is Divorced, has beaten his wife senseless, three kids age 11, 10, and 9 and they are afraid to be around him. Been on Cocaine since College. He can barely carry a conversation from loss of brain cells. He's pretty much not mentally sound and guess what he does for a living? Yeah, he drives a School Bus full of Kids every day. I wouldn't trust him with my own Son. Anyhow, He has written numerous letters beyond 20 pages to my Family and speaks mostly of the pressures my Dad put on him with sports and trying to get a full-ride to College.

Am I saying all the Kids pressured will turn out like my loser Brother? Certainly not, but it can happen. Sorry so long, but I just cant stand to see that it's probably even more prevalent today than it was back then.

[Art]

Originally posted by vellinga
Sounds like your son has a good coach, Art.

Definately......the team did well all year, which proves you don't have to rant, scream etc to have a good team.

[Art]

Originally posted by newblu
[B


Sure officials make bad calls, but they get a whole lot more right. And they're generally in a better position to see the play than dad from the stands.

could they have been calling a one sided game? sure...but who cares? these were 6-8 year olds. IMO that's too young to be competing in competitive tournament anyway. Oh it wasn't a competitive tourney? then lighten up!!

[/B]

Well, as in most tournaments, it is competitive. The kids played their hearts out hoping to win. And, they knew on their own the other team was doing wrong, and after the game asked why the ref was calling their fouls, and missing most of the other teams. And, they were asking how come the other team could do everything they were told they couldn't. So, even without the parents, thet knew something was wrong.

[ramirami]

and finally this happens :

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/200...awl/index.html

[smurray]

Well put newblu. I too volunteer as a youth soccer coach and referee for my son's 8-9 year old team. I agree, we're all out doing the job the best we can and as fairly as we can. I make the calls I see as I see them, no matter who's playing. In the past I've had to ref my own teams games and tend to feel the urge to call fouls more closely my team commits them.

As a coach I try to meet with my parents before the first practice and tell them that their kids are out there to have fun. Nothing is more fun to most kids that age than making their parents happy. I tell them to let the coaches coach, the referee's ref, and to let the kids play. Never get so into the game that you're not enjoying it. If the ref makes a bad call, let it go after all, it's supposed to be fun.

I'll admit that I have argued calls when I'm coaching my team and every time I do I regret it after wards. I have to apologize to the kids for my behavior.